Familiar skin

Recently, I have been trying to find myself underneath all the weight life throws on me. Subconsciously i know I'm there, but i need to bring myself to the surface again. Fresh breath of air, gasp, and then reacquaint myself in my own skin.I can almost feel it but not quite enough to fully take hold. There are still some corners I have yet to fill out. Strangers of my own that i must find in the fog and bring home.Shadows I must bring to light. I cant wait to feel completely alive again. I cant wait to feel familiar to myself instead of being an "outsider looking in". I can't wait to finally get a chance of waking up to my own feet. To finally sink down into the dirt between my toes of my once familar trail and come home as nothing but me.

The World

Such a perfect day to say the least. I have woken up to the sun. another day to see the most of what I didn’t need to change. So relaxing and calm I fell into myself once more to watch the day go by me. No pressure to show myself and face the world. I found myself quite comfortable in such a place as myself, air to breathe, things to see, voices to hear, and yet no pressure to interact. I felt at home at last. I wish everyday were like this. I have realized much more than I ever have before, being the observer. I learned how this world can quietly spin without a single thought. I could hold my breath and yet it would still turn. In a way, its beautiful. To know that you are not in complete control. Just a simple life in the gigantic works of the universe. Waiting and watching for that sun come to come up and greet you again.

Lips So Tyrant

I never knew that the same soft lips i kiss everyday, could spit such tyranny back at me. I used to think of them as home but now i cant seem to find a single ounce of familiarity.I don't think they know me anymore. They speak so foolishly of me, pointing out my every wrong just to break the silence. I then go about this asking if it is me who is to blame? No. it couldn't be. Not me. i wonder what they say when I'm not around. Do they yearn for me or do they long for yet another one of my absences? I fear to say it has gotten harder to tell. I cant seem to comprehend why i cant make them smile. I have done everything. everything i thought right and so little of what i thought wrong. Once again I am left to wonder if it is me. I know in the end its going to be difficult to believe them. Their words mean nothing when the damage is done. How much longer must i be poisoned by them? How much more before they suck me dry? such harsh concepts, i know, but one cannot recover from such reoccurring odds. I'm sure i cant keep doing this forever. whether it kills me, I'll never know. If it does, I'm sure they'll be the first to know. I'd like to say i am lucky enough to beat the facts, but like always, cold hard honesty comes to steal the win right from under me. by this point, there is no turning back. What is done is done. and what said is heard. whether or not ill forever be on the receiving end ill never know. for such lips i once knew, they ll never again feel like home.

KEANE Bedshaped http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b61EeXnwpLA&feature=fvw

The true Hide And Seek

Love.